There’s a “method to every madness.” I suppose I’m diagnosing myself with madness, whatever that is. 

“All great ideas are deadly.”

I write about my own beliefs and about being borderline suicidal, depressed, clueless as to why I do what I do and the list can go on. Why though? I don’t want your attention. I most likely don’t even know who you are. What I do know is that you read my pieces. And I love helping people. Whoever you are, I want to help you by addressing my own problems. I like to think that I’m not the only one with my problems. If you rebut with “I wish you could help” as if it was impossible, then stop being so closed, and test me. I’m not here to keep you alive, if you want to die, that’s your choice. It’s also your choice to help yourself in whatever way you need help. Just know that Sway will always be right here on this website to accompany you on your perxplexing journey.

 I’m not praising myself. All I’ve done so far is divulge to you all of my “cons.” Well, if you care to know what some of my “pros” are then read the next paragraph. If not, skip it. 

I’m surprisingly good at solving most complex problems about life. “I’ve been through it all.” And if not, I’ve known and come to understand others who have gone through far worse. Not a single person, place or thing fazes me anymore than they would faze a stone. Drugs, alcohol and weed no longer influence my mind. I’ve been known to be more down to earth than any adult. I’ve reached a level of inner peace that is oh-so rare in humans. So trust me, whatever you may be going through, I can and will do my best to aide you. I’m never judging or malevolent to those who are truly troubled. I don’t exaggerate or lie when I say “I know what you’re going through,” like everyone else does.

I’m good at listening and sending feedback. Not your cliche “positive” feedback. I believe in negativity to then give fruition to positivity. To win a militaristic war, one must accept the wretched but inescapable paths of loss and dismay. One must comprehend that victory is not guaranteed. You must understand that you could put forth an exceeding amount of effort and energy to help your cause, but in the end, it may have all been in vain when you lose. 

Or, all that effort and energy could have the outcome of victory. It’s the same with our war. I don’t only seek to aide others. I strive to help myself. I do in fact want to be a marvelous father one day. I won’t be able to help a baby if I can’t help myself. So first, I must help myself. I must affix and atone my soul.

I find “loner” by Kali Uchis to be true


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